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  Always and never are two words you should always remember never to use.

Wendell Johnson

  Embarrassing Stories
  During my first year in college, I lived on the campus' first "co-ed by room" dormitory floor.

All the other floors had girls in one wing, and boys in the other wing, separated by a big shared lounge. But on our floor we had girls next door and directly across the hallway. It worked out great, and there were no problems or complaints.

Anyway, one morning I woke up early and had to take a leak, so I sleepily shuffled down the hallway toward the bathroom, wearing only my boxer shorts. Nothing out of the ordinary.

I passed a couple of girls on their way to breakfast and I mumbled a half-awake "good morning." They didn't respond. Instead, they stopped walking, turned around and watched me, as I walked past them. Then they burst out laughing.

I thought, "What's up with them?! This is how people look in the morning, when they're half awake." I walked into the bathroom, stepped into the stall, and reached down to free the Big Guy for a much needed pee.

To my horror, the Big Guy was already out of the front of my boxers! And he wasn't looking the least bit sleepy! He'd been proudly saluting all the way to the bathroom! I guess it's true what they say: You can't keep a good man down.
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